Here’s how to overcome the overwhelm of your first leadership role

When you first take a leadership role, it can feel overwhelming and lonely.

You’ve moved from being ‘part of the team’ to someone leading the team. All of a sudden the office chat isn’t the same when you’re around, maybe tea breaks or lunches are a bit different or maybe you’ve gone from a comfort zone of practice to an uncomfortable zone of feeling out of your depth as a new leader.

Trust me, we have all been there.

You are not alone in feeling the way you do and eventually, it’ll get easier.

I’m going to share a few things I wish I would’ve known as a new leader in the hopes it’ll help you.

You do not need to know it all.

It’s ok to say you don’t know or you need to think about it and get back to the person. I thought I had to show that I deserved the position by knowing everything, but all it did was set me up to fail. There’s real growth in the humility of acknowledging you don’t know something as it then gives room for others in the team to admit they also don’t know or need support.

You don’t need to be anyone other than you.

It might sound silly, but there are so many books, podcasts, and well-meaning people who will tell you that you need to be charismatic or decisive or firm or cold or hard or inflexible or loud…the list goes on. Don’t try to be someone you’re not. We all have a natural style and way of being. Maybe you’re an introvert or neurodivergent or creative or spontaneous. Embrace who you are and find a way to make that your super power as a leader.

I’m an introvert but spend many years trying to portray myself as an extrovert as I was told I needed to be the loudest voice in the room and have more of a presence in order to be a successful leader. All I did was exhaust myself by trying to be someone I wasn’t. However, when I embraced who I was, I realised that by focussing on one on one conversations, I really tuned in to individuals and found a super power in then combining this understanding to create teams that thrived.

Don’t take the privilege of leadership for granted.

Just because you have authority because of your role doesn’t mean you have power. In order to truly lead in a way that brings people along with you, you need to work WITH them, walk alongside them when the going gets tough, listen to their ideas and embrace some uncomfortable conversations. People will respect you more when you’re real with them, admit when you’ve gotten something wrong and give them a platform for their ideas and practice to be celebrated. There’s nothing worse than a leader who claims other’s ideas as their own or who refuses to admit when they’ve gotten something wrong.

Find a mentor.

Someone who has been there and done that. Someone you admire. Someone who will challenge you and push you, but ultimately support you to be your best. Someone who won’t tell you what to do, but ask the right questions to help you decide what’s right for you and right for your team.

It’s ok to not be ok.

Leadership can be tough. It can feel lonely. There will be days where you feel tired, sad, overwhelmed, worried…and that’s ok. It’s ok to be down sometimes. It’s ok to need a break. When you show up but keep powering through things, pretending you’re not impacted yet others can tell you’re not yourself, it gives them the message that they need to bottle things up and also power through. But when you show up and share that you’re operating at a 60/100 that day, so ask for people to bear with you, it gives your staff the message that it’s ok to not be ok. It’s ok to show up and do your best with what you have. It encourages the team to pull together and for those who are operating at 100 to give a little bit to support those operating at a bit less.

Embrace mistakes and learn from them.

Stop trying to be perfect. It can’t be done. I promise….I’ve tried. I have had my biggest growth and learning through mistakes. You’re going to make them…lots of them. So embrace it and accept that it’s a way for you to learn and grow as a leader.

Leadership is an exciting journey. I work with everyone from aspiring leaders to those who have been in the game a long time to explore their self-awareness, consider their self-development and build on their leadership skills. If you want to know more about how I can support you through 1:1 coaching, book a consultation below.

If you’re interested in support on your improvement journey,
book a free consultation here.